What is the function of the little red flags on the course? Are they to mark the line of our watering system ?

No. They are to mark for greens staff the line of the fairway cut – i.e. the boundary between fairway and rough.

How are members reacting to the new coloured flags to mark pin locations? Many have commented that the blue flags are very difficult to see against a dark background.

The different coloured flags have been much welcomed. The blue flags have now been exchanged for white.

Have the greens staff noticed that the watering system is leaking at certain locations and that the water fountains are not functioning properly?

Both these matters are receiving attention. The leaks are for the most part associated with the recent installation of further mist sprayers for the bunkers and the firm involved is being recalled to remedy matters. Replacement parts are awaited for the malfunctioning water fountains. These are not kept in stock as they can be very expensive and their final use is not guaranteed.

Are greens staff fully aware of their tree-watering responsibilities in this (and any other) dry spell?

Yes. The trees are being watered accordingly.

Who is responsible for ensuring that the club heating system responds to daily temperature changes and turns off/turns on radiators as appropriate?

Although many of the radiators are fitted with individual thermostats, such is the complexity of the club’s heating system that it is not possible to have one thermostat exercising overall control. It is therefore left to the bar staff to turn up/turn down heating according to the temperature and members’ wishes.

How much interest has been expressed by members in the possible introduction of proximity/fob cards?

The Managing Secretary has received much comment on this subject, all of it favourable. Those members who have contacted him, either by email or in person, would generally be happy to pay a small premium (say £10) for a card that can be both swiped at the bar and simply waved out of the car window to secure exit from the club. What these members do not want is to have to carry two cards. The technology exists to produce a card that performs both functions. If such cards introduced, they must be for everyone. If you have a view on proximity/fob cards, please make it known to the Managing Secretary.

Charity Day this year will be on Saturday, September 15, so make sure the date is in your diary. This promises to be the usual fun-packed event and will again support the local spinal injuries charity, Aspire, based at the Royal National Orthopedic hospital in Stanmore.

We are not going to try to outdo last year’s results as they were amazing, but we would like to raise as much money as possible. Please keep this date free and bring your wives/girlfriends/husbands/boyfriends for an excellent meal and auction in the evening.

If you would care to make a donation or have anything that we can auction or raffle, please contact Linda Lambert or Jas Arora.

Andy Gristwood and Dave Toms are the owners of the eponymous firm, tree cutters to the gentry and others. Members for a couple of years now, they’ve been of particular assistance in the current tree-planting programme, not only donating some 30 specimen trees, but also enabling us to get very large discounts from their suppliers. Consequently, Martin Smith and his staff have a further 25-plus trees to plant in the coming weeks.

Not only that: members will have noticed that the  wet ground outside the machinery shed caused a large pine to all but topple. Andy and Dave, however, reckon they’ve got the machinery to save it, as the tree itself is still very much alive.

I do invite members therefore to raise a glass to them.

Alan Pountney
Chair of Green

New date for your diary: The England v Rest of the World match will take place on Sunday, July 8. The Captain would like this to be a mixed match. So, ladies, don’t be shy - please put your name down as soon as the team sheet appears. The Captain has bought a new trophy for this match and hopes as many members as possible will take part.

The club’s house, adjacent to the 1st tee and normally occupied by club staff, remains available for rent. As no staff are at present seeking accommodation, the committee are offering it on a six-month lease, ideally to a member or members but, failing that, to some other suitable person known to a member. All inquiries to the Managing Secretary, please.

Don’t forget our girls-only golf morning, aimed at encouraging younger players to take up the game. The date is Sunday, May 13, and the time 10am.  And all aged 5-18yrs are welcome.

With his customary diligence and attention to detail, Mike Dexter kindly undertook a brief review of the files and documents stored in the loft space adjacent to the club’s offices, writes Chairman John Liddle.

He also researched the role of the archivist as distinct from the manager of records, the historian, the librarian and the museum curator and concluded that the archivist works principally with carefully selected paper, film and electronic records chosen for their likely future importance.

Some valuable work was done in connection with the club’s centenary. Unfortunately, Mike’s many other commitments made it impossible for him to carry this work on to the next stage. Although the position is unpaid, the club recognises its importance.

Financial and other resources will be made available to support the successful applicant. The role requires someone who has a strong affection for the club and its history and the ability to work carefully and methodically.

Please indicate your interest in this post by contacting the Managing Secretary, who will provide further details.

The visit of the Sports Turf Research Institute took place in early March in very wet conditions. This gave STRI’s John Lockyer and me the opportunity to discuss drainage problems on the course. Areas highlighted were: 12th walkway, 15th rough, 16th fairway, 17th fairway/rough, 17th practice ground.

The full STRI report is on the notice board but uses more technical phrases than in previous years.

Painting of the water tank will take place shortly now that we have sourced some paint that is suitable for use on galvanised steel. Thanks to Russell Lewis for his help in this matter.

The 10th path will be reconstructed with new matting to stop wash-out of the current surface. If this is successful we will use it on the 6th and both the 8th paths.

There are still several trees to be planted around the course to create new copses. This will be done between the 2nd and 3rd holes, the 3rd and 4th, and the 5th and 10th.

Martin Smith
Course Manager

No fewer than 104 diners sat down to Good Friday’s fish supper at which they were presented with a wonderful selection of fish dishes prepared by Tim and his staff.

This was followed by a quiz, which included a clever “marathon” round provided by the ladies’ Captain, Linda Lambert. The club Captain thanked the kitchen and bar staff for their excellent service which did much to ensure the success of the evening.

Forthcoming events:
June 8: Nine, wine and dine. Watch the noticeboard for further details – and next month’s Tee Times.
June 23: Summer Ball - sold out, but still time to put your name down on the reserve list in the office.
July 13:  BBQ for golfer and non-golfer. This will be a repeat of last year’s successful formula in which the golfer plays from tee to green and the non-golfer does all the putting.

A true story by Alan Pountney

Sunday, March 25, was the first day of summertime and the first medal of the year.  There was a full field. Hope was alive everywhere, expectation even.

The Captain and I had a start time of 10.30am, yet at 10.25 no car was visible in his space. I phoned him with the obvious question... which doesn’t have an answer, really.

Some 25 minutes later he arrived. His son, who knew about BST, hadn’t told him, etc, etc.

The conversation went as follows:

AMP: You are late and you are disqualified.

JA: This is a plot. You are against colonials. I am certainly not kicked out of this, or anything.

AMP: It can’t be a plot. I’m a colonial myself.

JA: That’s not the same. In any event, I base my time on the club clock - and that shows I’m still on time.

So we play… and he goes pretty well until the 12th. There, he hits two into the field and finally holes out quite nicely for an 8.

He then reminds me of the nut mix I gave him when we played recently. He didn’t finish it all and put what was left in his bag, a brand new bag as it happened.

The bag now has several neat holes in it and the Captain has discovered that he has mice in his garage.

When it is all over he is still smiling. And I can but ask: “How does he do it?”

Following his resignation, the club would like to thank Stuart Law for his many years’ work in helping to produce Tee Times. It was Stuart whose notion this monthly newsletter was and he who designed and produced it in the hard copy form members have come to know from the first edition in January 1999 until last month.

A replacement for Stuart is urgently sought. If you have desktop publishing skills and equipment and are able to take on this regular commitment, the Managing Secretary will pleased to hear from you. Meantime, of necessity, Tee Times will be produced only in A4 format.

I ran the London Marathon in last Sunday’s tropical conditions and am pleased to report that it was still Sunday when I completed it, writes Richard Scott.  I finished in daylight hours and was about 33,000th out of 36,500, proof that my healthy diet and severe training regime paid off.

I ran for the Parkinson’s Disease Society and am grateful to all who sponsored me. If there are any members who would like to swell my contribution, it’s not too late. Please contact me.

If you’re eager for more statistics, I was the last male Scott to finish, although three female Scotts came in behind me. It was so hot that I drank 15 pints of water without having to stop (if you get my meaning) and was beaten to the line by a pint of Guinness, two rhinos, an ostrich and a sailing boat. But I thrashed Mr Happy, Mr Nosey and a banana.

All in all, a thoroughly enjoyable day.  And I went to work on Monday.

Our new teaching professional, Matthew Masters, has settled in well and is establishing good rapport with members.

Requests for lessons are flowing in steadily and he is as busy as he hoped to be. All in all, he says, Porters Park has been a good move for him and he is very happy here.

The Captain is pleased to welcome as full playing members: Philip Cole, Jonathan Cressey, Devesh Gundecha and Nick Eaves.

The club regrets to record the deaths of Mervyn Orchard-Lisle (father of Paul), a Life Member and Past Captain, and of Wilfred Best.

Alan Pountney and Nick Draper who beat Doug Nelson and Steve McAlister at the 19th to win the Murrayfield Scarifiers Quaich

Avtar Ranshi and Jayendra Patel who beat Daniel Marsh and Craig Hutson 6&5 to win the Coral Salver

Ken Specter, Simon Goran, Richard Selwyn and Lewis Myers who won the Members’ Fourball Alliance with 86pts from Stuart Cohen, Sandy McCallum, Victor Lye and Manvinder Arora with 82pts

Derek Fotheringham and Michael Collin who won the Whitehead Trophy 4BBB stableford with 49pts from Daniel Marsh and Craig Hutson with 45pts

Michael Collin and guest N Binstead who won the Men’s Invitation with 49pts from Roland Wild and guest M Cairns with 44pts

Ken Specter who won the Humble Salver with 83-18 = 65 from Simon Peck with 72-6 = 66

Anita Healy and Janet Longhurst who won the Easter Monday mixed 4BBB stableford with 45pts from Janet and Brian Hardy with 41pts

John Eshmene who won Div I of the March medal with 77-10 = 67 from Luke Gutteridge with 77-4=68. Div II was won by Alan Ring with 85-17 = 68 from Neil Ring with 91-19 = 72

Justin Saunders who won the April midweek stableford with 35pts (last 9) from John Freeman

Pam Cohen and Anita Healey who won the Coronation Foursomes with 32pts from Shirley Gudgeon and Janet Kilsby with 31pts

Rena Delaney who won the Swinstead Cup

Sue Hawkey and Ros Lake who won the Ping 4BBB with 39pts from Eirwen Cox and Janet Kilsby with 38pts

Linda Lambert and Joan Dulieu who won the Ladies’ Centenary Foursomes with 38pts (back 9) from Suzanne Peterson and Jean Marett

The ladies’ Mail on Sunday team who won away against Overstone Park. Their next match is at home against West Byfleet on May 12.